In this blog post, I’ll explore the limiting beliefs that prevent us mums from prioritising self-care and mindfulness, and share how to overcome them for a more sustainable, joy- and restful life.
Why Is Self-Care So Difficult?
We mums are juggling a million things at once—work, home, children, and everything in between. Yet, amidst the chaos, self-care and mindfulness often fall to the bottom of our never-ending to-do lists. Why is it so difficult to prioritise these essential practices?
The answer often lies in deeply ingrained limiting beliefs. Let’s explore these beliefs and how they hold us back from nurturing ourselves and embracing a more mindful approach to parenting.
The Myth of Selflessness
One of the most pervasive limiting beliefs is the notion that ‘good’ mothers are selfless, always putting their family’s needs before their own. While nurturing and caring are fundamental aspects of motherhood, the idea that taking time for oneself is selfish can be harmful. The reality is that self-care isn’t a luxury; it’s a necessity.
When we neglect our own well-being, we end up running on empty, unable to fully support our families. Self-care is not an act of selfishness but one of love – for ourselves and our loved ones.
The ‘Super Mum’ Syndrome
Another common belief is the pressure to be a ‘super mum’ capable of doing it all without breaking a sweat. This unrealistic expectation often leads to burnout and frustration. It’s okay not to have all the answers or to need a break.
By letting go of the need to be perfect, we create space for self-compassion and growth. Remember, your worth isn’t measured by how much you can do, but by who you are.
The Time Trap
Many mums believe they simply don’t have the time for mindfulness or self-care. The day is filled with responsibilities, and carving out even a few minutes for oneself can seem impossible. However, mindfulness doesn’t require hours of meditation or a trip to a retreat.
It can be as simple as taking a few deep breaths, savouring a cup of tea, or being fully present during a walk with your child. By integrating small moments of mindfulness into daily life, we can cultivate a sense of calm and presence without drastically altering our schedules.
Investing a few minutes in self-care pays off multiple times over with increased calm, deeper connections, and even improved productivity.
By integrating small moments of mindfulness into daily life, we can cultivate a sense of calm and presence without drastically altering our schedules.
Mum Guilt
Guilt is a frequent companion for many mums. We worry that by taking time for ourselves, we’re neglecting our children or partners. This guilt can be a significant barrier to prioritising self-care and mindfulness.
It’s important to remember that a well-cared-for mother is better equipped to care for others. By nurturing ourselves, we model healthy behaviours for our children, teaching them the importance of balance, self-respect and rest.
Difficulty Setting Boundaries
Many mums struggle with setting boundaries, both with their families and themselves. The belief that we should always be available for our children can lead to overcommitting and feeling overwhelmed. Establishing boundaries, such as designated ‘me-time’ or setting limits on household responsibilities, can be challenging but essential.
Boundaries are not about shutting others out; they’re about creating space to recharge and maintain our own well-being. By setting healthy boundaries, we teach our children the importance of respecting others’ needs and limits.
Difficulty Letting Go of Control
The desire to maintain control over all aspects of family life can also hinder the ability to prioritise self-care and mindfulness. Many mums feel that things won’t get done ‘right’ unless they do them themselves. This need for control can be exhausting and prevent others from stepping in to help.
Letting go of control involves trusting others, whether it’s a partner, family member, or even our children, to manage tasks. It also means accepting that things might not always go perfectly – and that’s okay. By releasing the reins, we allow ourselves the freedom to focus on our own needs and cultivate a more balanced life.
Overcoming These Limiting Beliefs
Breaking free from these limiting beliefs starts with awareness. Acknowledge the stories you’ve been telling yourself and question their validity. Are they truly serving you? Challenge these narratives by seeking supportive communities, like mindful parenting courses or yoga classes, where you can connect with others who share similar experiences.
Embrace the idea that self-care and mindfulness are not just individual practices but a communal one. They allow you to connect more deeply with your children, partner, and yourself.
Remember, you’re not alone in this journey. Many mums feel overwhelmed, stretched thin, and guilty. But by prioritising your well-being, you not only transform your own life but also create a positive ripple effect for those around you.
Conclusion
It’s time to release the limiting beliefs that hold us back and embrace a more compassionate, mindful approach to motherhood. Self-care isn’t this elusive thing only a privileged few have access to. It’s something we can start to implement today that costs nothing and takes less than 5 minutes. Simple micro-practices can have an enormous impact on our day.
Mums are often drowning right now, especially in places like Switzerland where the high cost of childcare, relatively short paid parental leave (at least compared to many EU countries), and the dissolution of ‘the village’ contribute to this overwhelming burden. No wonder we put ourselves last!
We sacrifice our health and time and enjoyment for the greater good of the family. But let me ask you this: How is that working out? How are your mood, physical health, and relationships when you sacrifice ‘me-time’ and put everyone first?
Maybe the reason we’re sick of hearing the metaphor, ‘You must put your own oxygen mask on first!’ is because we don’t even know where the mask is! It’s buried under toys, dishes, laundry, work emails, sports gear, and people needing us.
What’s Next for You to Embrace Self-Care?
So, take a deep breath, let go of the guilt and control, and remember- you deserve care and kindness just as much as anyone else. Prioritising self-care isn’t a sign of weakness or selfishness; it’s a powerful act of self-love that benefits everyone.
To incorporate more mindfulness in your life and enjoy all the related benefits, which will create a ripple effect in your entire life, join the Mindful Parenting Course. Learn more about it and sign up for the waitlist for the next starting date in September HERE.
And, in the meantime, download my free Mindful Mama Cheat Sheet HERE, for further support.
